Friday, February 1, 2013

And so it begins

It's official! IVF #3 is a go!

I had my baseline ultrasound yesterday and I am cyst-free. Unfortunately, I only had 7 follicles. Last month I had a record high of 9 and was hoping they would all stick around. Oh well. 7 is still the most I have started with in any IVF cycle.

After seeing Dr. N, I had to go pick up all the meds. We have a specialty pharmacy in LA so I don't have to order my meds ahead of time. I just pick them up as I need them. It's takes some stress off of me having to micromanage my meds to make sure I don't run out. The best part is that this pharmacy is near UC.LA. We don't go there very often because parking is terrible and hanging out around college kids just makes me feel old. But SH's favorite pizza place is there and there is the most amazing cookie place (delicious cookies that are 35 cents each!). So whenever we need to pick up more meds we treat ourselves to one or the other (sometimes both) since it's the only time we are in that neighborhood. Yesterday we had pizza. When I go for refills I will pick up some cookies.

I started the injections as soon as I got home from the pharmacy. Back to the old routine again. Retrieval is tentatively scheduled for February 9 and transfer is Valentine's Day (if I make it to a 5 day transfer).  After so much waiting, it is all starting to happen so fast.

I am feeling strangely numb about the whole thing. I need to find some hope in all of this. We were both excited to start last month and the delay knocked us down a bit and both of us seem to have this feeling of doom hanging over us. SH commented that it felt like we were on a death march as we were walking up to the pharmacy. So we are both going to make an effort to find some positive and hope. He is much better at that than I am. I think I just need to get through my first monitoring appointment and know that I am responding to the drugs and then maybe I can embrace this cycle a little more.  I need to allow myself to have hope because, if it fails, it's hurts just as much whether I expect the best or the worst so I might as well spend some time imagining the best.

9 comments:

  1. I will hold the hope with you. I know how hard it can be to carry it on your own.

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  2. Yay! I agree that hope and positive thoughts are always helpful.

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  3. Agreed! It is like a new phrase I just learned in blog world: PUPO! You will believe this cycle will work UPO! We will be on the same schedule! My donor's retrieval is tentatively the 12th and our transfer is tentatively the 17th!

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  4. I think it's hard to get excited and be positive about it after you've been through it already. We know that it doesn't always work. We've learned to be disappointed. However, I am still excited for you and the possibilities that may result from this cycle. I wish you lotsa luck!!!! Grow little follies grow! And don't forget, sometimes there are hidden follicles that can't be seen at the baseline check, so who knows? Maybe you'll end up with more.

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  5. Yay! I hope you do manage to find that positivity and hope, but in the meantime, please know that I hold plenty of both for you. This is exciting, I have everything crossed for you!

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  6. Good luck with this cycle. I don't have any good advice for how to handle the strain of it, especially when you've been through it before, but at least this part is the part that goes by quickly.

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  7. I know what you mean about the numb feeling. It's so hard to get excited when you're worried it will fail. But we'll get excited for you and help you through it!

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  8. Glad to hear that you're cleared for take-off! That's an exciting first step. A previous response doesn't always predict the response for a next cycle. Cheering for your follicles!

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